Trying to stay sane!

Trying to stay sane!

Thanks for all your feedback on Thursday’s post. I still have 1.5 kilograms to lose by Saturday, but I’m confident that my ridiculous water loading/sodium manipulation/zero-carb diet will get me there. I never thought I’d be more stressed about making weight than actually competing itself, but hey ho. I’m not going to post what I am doing in detail until after the comp is over, as I frankly don’t need anyone else weighing in with their opinion (I get enough of that in real life!).

I just wanted to quickly address some of the things brought up after last week’s post:

1. No, I will not even consider pulling out of this competition for a second. It’s a national-level competition that I qualified for, competing against the best in the country. I have been training all year for this moment, and I’m not about to throw that all away for a pesky 1.5kg. I am likely to turn up as weak as a kitten on the day, but at least I will be there to give it my best shot.

2. I have decided to withdraw from the competition in November. Considering I have cut carbs completely and I’m still struggling to lose a single pound, I dread to think what it would be like to have to get to 70kg. I don’t think the people around me want to find out, either! My sanity and mental health are far more important to me than an amateur competition. This sport is supposed to be fun, and this is the first time it hasn’t been for me.

I cannot live like this for another two months!

I cannot eat like this for another two months!

3. Consequently, I will not be competing for at least another 8 months. This should give me enough time for me to figure out what the hell is going on with my body.

4. The only reason I need to lose weight is for my competition. I do not think I’m fat or have any desire to give up eating burgers. On Thursday, I became really upset with the number on the scale purely because I’d been dieting for what seemed like no reason. After Saturday, I have no intention of weighing myself for at least six months. I am not the number on the scale.

5. No, I will not compete in the Open Weight division. The idea is ridiculous given I’m only 1-2 kilograms over the cut-off, and I would have to go up against women who weigh as much as 130kg. Plus I am nowhere near strong enough to hit open-level weights.

Right, moving on to my final week of workouts! As you can imagine, they were not great but considering I haven’t had a carb since 1995, I was surprised that I managed to hit all my weights for “peak week” without failure. I finally worked my way up to 85 per cent for deadlifts and log press, but skipped out on squats and bench press as they are not relevant to my comp and not worth hurting myself over in my carb-depleted state.

Monday – Squats
Back squats: 20kg x 10, 10, 40kg x 5, 60kg x 5, 70kg x 3, 76kg x 2 x 8
Inverted row: 8 x 4
Standing leg curl: 15kg x 12 x 3

Not much to report as it was still early on in the week and I wasn’t knocking on death’s door just yet.

Wednesday – Pressing and Van Pulls
Log press: 30kg x 8, 35kg x 5, 42.5kg x 2 x 8
Bench press: 20kg x 10, 30kg x 5, 35kg x 5, 40kg x 3 x 8
Internal and external rotations
3 sets of 4 tonne van pulls, approx. 50 metres

I had no energy when I got home from work, but knew I needed to pull it together as this was going to be a tough workout. I took a nap and gave myself some extra carbs (all week I limited carbs to dinner only, so this was a real treat!).


My last dairy and grains!

Sure enough, I felt loads better and was able to smash everything. It was my only chance to practice the harness pull event, and I’m feeling pretty confident about it.

Here is a video of me pulling the van (sorry about the angle, but there was only two of us and someone needs to drive!):

Thursday – Deadlifts
Deadlifts: 60kg x 8, 80kg x 5, 100kg x 5, 110kg x 2 x 8
Trap bar deadlifts: 55kg x 8, 95kg x 5, 115kg x 3, 125kg x 9 (max reps in 75 seconds)

Everything started to fall apart from Thursday onwards. Thursday was when I weighed myself and when I started to really feel the effects of going low-carb. I had to stop multiple times while walking to the gym and questioned how I was going to get through any of my workout. I kept it simple, scrapped all the accessory exercises and really took my time between sets.

Another thing which I failed to mention is I that have aggravated my shoulder/mid-back injury from last year. My first warm-up set felt okay, but when I picked up 80kg it felt like my back ripped in half. I still got through all my sets, even if they were a little slow. I’m hoping a massage this week will sort that out.

I’m also experiencing serious low-carb brain fog, evidenced by the fact I didn’t load the bar evenly for my max rep attempt and therefore had to psych myself up twice!

You know you’re not in a good place when you cry while failing to cut your steak.


Saturday – The last one!
Log press: 30kg x 8, 35kg x 5, 40kg x 5, 45kg x 2 x 8
Front squats: 20kg x 8, 40kg x 5, 50kg x 5, 60kg x 3
Seated cable row: 45kg x 12 x 3
Cable curls: 30kg x 12 x 4

This was the hardest workout of my life. The workout itself wasn’t that bad, but oh the drama beforehand! On Friday night, I did a mini water cut. I woke up in tears in the middle of the night and thought I was going to pass out, so I cheated by having about 100ml of water. I went back to bed and then went straight to the gym in the morning to weigh myself. Despite all that hell, I was still 76.2kg.

I very stupidly went to dancing (I hadn’t been for three weeks because of events training, and knew I wouldn’t be able to go next week so didn’t want to miss any more classes). My brain struggled to pick up the choreography and my body hadn’t rehydrated in time, so I felt super dizzy and had to stop three-quarters of the way through.

Being the genius that I am, I thought it would be a great idea to head straight to the gym afterwards and get it out of the way. That backfired and I went home to have a breakdown. Given how awful I felt then, I was questioning how bad I was going to feel on the day of the comp. How the hell I was going to max out and compete well, I didn’t know. I went home, had a nap, drank some electrolytes and ate some food, and felt a lot better (I am clearly a baby given how much I enjoy eating and sleeping).

I went back to the gym and did the bare minimum of my programming. I really couldn’t afford to skip this workout as it was my final one, and I knew I would have no confidence if I hadn’t lifted 45kg overhead a few times before comp day. I was due to also peak my bench and squats and practice farmers walks but I did have to be somewhat sensible so I scrapped that idea. I went to bed with a happy belly full of potatoes.


I woke up Sunday feeling much better and my head had finally stopped spinning. I went rock-climbing for a friend’s birthday, which was another stupid idea. I had been planning to have a cheat meal on Sunday night as somewhat of a refeed (I bloody needed it!!!) but Hawksmoor had run out of roasts. I ended up having steak, sweet potato and broccoli, so I had a dessert to make up for it.


I was 76.5kg this morning. It’s funny how I’m not craving sweet things at all – I’m thinking about all the bread, burgers, bagels and bacon I’m going to devour after weigh in!

I don’t know if I will have the energy to blog again before comp day, so please keep your fingers crossed for me that I will make weight on Saturday!

PS. I am aware that I come across as a completely psycho, disordered, unhealthy freak in this post. Only five more days!

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